I really hate it when I get like that.
Don’t worry; I’m not going to do it. As much as the idea of moving to Edmonton appeals to me, I can’t go through the process of applying to law school for a third year – especially when I’ve been ACCEPTED the first two times! It’s time to get this show on the road.
But needless to say, I’m a little stressed right now. I’m tired from all of those nights I worked and am pretty nervous about starting law school. I spent some time today reading some ‘Top Ten Lists’ which helped to calm my nerves. I know I can handle the schoolwork part; I’ve been in school so long that writing papers and exams is a breeze – as long as I don’t procrastinate. However, I’m paranoid about this whole Socratic method where apparently the teachers call on anyone at anytime to answer a question. And I have it on good authority that at least 2 of my 6 profs are some of the worst on faculty. Then there’s the ‘mooting’ thing which scares me to death; I can sing in front of people but speaking in front of them can be an issue – especially when it’s for school. But mostly, I’m just worried that I’m going to be a sucky lawyer.
And then there’s the whole thing with Thesis. There’s a very real possibility that I’ll have to completely withdraw from my Master’s program and then apply for readmission after I’m done law school. This afternoon I fired off another e-mail to the College of Grad Studies asking them for advice as to what I should do (my first went unanswered). I’m more than happy to complete it next summer or finish it concurrently with my first semester of law school. But I don’t think they’re going to let me do that. This whole situation is what’s bugging me more than anything.
So to get out of my funk, I decided to leave the house and head out to Starbucks for something nice and cool; it also seemed like a good opportunity to do my annual ‘goodbye to summer’ walk. With a Strawberries and Cream frappuccino in hand, I drove out to River Landing. My original plan was to go to favourite spot on the east side of the Broadway Bridge, but when I drove there I found out that there was construction going on and I couldn’t get through. I really, really, REALLY wish it would have been open for reasons that will become more apparent…
It was beautiful down by the river. There was a nice breeze, no bugs and it was relatively quiet. I took a few pictures, only one of which turned out half-decently, and walked north towards the Victoria Bridge and its cheesy lights (I still can’t believe the city put out $500,000 for those tacky lights). The Landing was full of activity the farther north I walked. There were at least 15-20 people salsa dancing, or learning to salsa dance, lots of couples sitting and walking around, many dogs walking their owners and even some parents with their kids. I found a bench a little ways away from the main crowd and settled myself in to enjoy the beautiful evening. I was even singing ‘Harvest Moon’ in my head as I watched the reflection of the moon on the river.
And then I heard a voice. A very familiar voice.
It took me a minute to place it. I turned around to see who it belonged too, even though I had a very good idea of who it was and knew it was the last person I needed to see tonight.
It was my thesis supervisor.
I silently swore and quickly turned back around, hoping he wouldn’t recognize me. And he didn’t. He was with a couple of other people, engaged in conversation and didn’t even glance at me.
Why, oh why, oh WHY did there have to be construction on the other side of the bridge?? The close encounter left me rattled, mostly because I took it as a sign (and because I haven’t sent him my first draft). So I hightailed it out of there, as my peaceful mood had vanished and my salute to summer was ruined.
Ugh. Not the way I wanted to start the year.